Verdiepingsdag Het Huis van Liefde

The days are full of work, sports, family, and friends. And so couples get into a rhythm, things just go the way they go, which is safe and predictable, but also monotonous. There is a risk that couples lose track of each other and slowly drift apart.

Whatever your situation, it can be valuable to step off the moving train and reflect on the basics: the two of you together. What is going well and what can you strengthen? What are you grateful for and can you celebrate? What’s missing and what is a source of strife?

This in-depth day brings up to six couples together for an in-depth exploration of their relationship. Away from all agendas and to dos, we map out where there is flow, where things are stagnating and what you can do to make the foundations stronger.

Because we keep the group small, the two of you will have plenty of attention and space for your own themes. But there will also be opportunities for exchanging experiences, so that couples can learn from each other and we can find recognition in each other.


08:30 – 09:00
Couples arrive at the location. There is coffee and tea.
09:00 – 10:00
We get to know each other and look at what the weekend will be like. We listen to an inspiring story and take our attention inside. We prepare, become quiet.
10:00 – 11:00
Relationship at its best
We start with what is good and what works. What are we grateful for, when are you as a couple at your best? What about your relationships is strong in those moments? How can you maintain that and expand it even further?
11:00 – 11:15
11:15 – 12:45
House of the Love
A strong and resilient House of Love has nine building blocks. What are they? Which parts are strong in your relationship and which should receive more attention? This research-based house offers a clear framework in which couples know more clearly where they stand and what to do to strengthen the relationship.
12:45 – 13:30
Recharge your batteries with a good meal.
13:30 – 15:00
Relationship shadow
We explore the shadow side of your relationship. Together you sketch when and how your relationship gets in trouble. We also learn about four destructive behaviours that are capable of undermining any relationship. Shedding light on this shadow side allows you to begin mending what is torn and preventing any further damage.
15:00 – 15:15
15:15 – 16:45
Four tools
We explore the antidotes to the four destructive behaviours. When can you use them and how? What can you agree to as a couple? This gives you practical tools to turn the tide and avoid potential pitfalls in your relationship.
16:45 – 17:00
Wrap up
After an intense day we wrap up. We summarize, set an intention for the future of our relationship and say goodbye to each other.

Location: Landgoed De Horst (Driebergen)

Here we use the Salon on the 1st floor of the main building. This is a bright room with a warm atmosphere.

De Horst’s kitchen uses sustainable, organic and regional products. The estate has its own vegetable garden and beehives.

The estate has been nominated for Best Training Location of 2021. It borders directly on the forest, so you can have a nice walk in the afternoon. There are plenty parking spaces and charging stations. The estate has been awarded a Green Key, an international standard for sustainable companies.

De Horst is located at De Horst 1, 3971 KR in Driebergen-Rijsenburg. For more information, check out the website.


This day is led by Ilja and Fleur and takes place on a weekend day from 09:00 to 17:00. The group is limited to six couples. Your investment is €395, which includes VAT, lunch, coffee, tea and refreshments. We work with all couples, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

Take note

Please know that this retreat is not a substitute for couples therapy. If you feel that your relationship requires more attention or is in the danger zone, we advise you to explore what therapy can do for you. Read more about our approach to couples therapy.